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Twitter Wit

08.25.09 // Writing

Perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised that my very first words published in print are in the form of a “tweet” I posted on Twitter on April Fool’s Day this year.

This particular savory morsel of bite-sized brilliance is in Twitter Wit: Brilliance in 140 Characters or Less, a brand new book from HarperCollins filled with several hundred very clever, witty, and pithy tweets. It is the very first Twitter-based book from a major publisher (of many to come, I’m sure). While my contribution (on page 73) only takes up roughly .15% of its content, its very inclusion proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that I must be one of the most interesting people on Twitter.

The Presentation of the Virgin

08.18.09 // Writing

My short piece “The Presentation of the Virgin” is now up at Thirty First Bird Review (scroll down a bit), a site with a focus on cultural/religious interplay. It’s an old piece, and I’ve always  had a bit of a soft spot for it—it’s based off this wonderful painting by the fifteenth-century Italian artist/monk/engineer Fra Carnevale.

As a boring, quiet tale about a man loitering around The Temple staring at the Virgin Mary, it’s not the kind of thing one tends to see published in the online literary scene, which more often feautres contemporary tales of relatively unhappy regular people (you know, people just like you and me) doing unhappy and probably damaging things to themselves either physically or mentally, usually told in first person with a forceful, energetic writing style.  But hey, it’s short—so read it anyway.

A Hint Fiction Anthology

08.14.09 // Miscellany

Robert Swartwood is a man after my own heart: a lover of the incredibly short-form. Earlier this year he coined the term “Hint Fiction” to mean “a story of 25 words or less that suggests a larger, more complex story.” Then he got a book deal from W.W. Norton to edit an anthology. Boom, like lightning.

When I first read about hint fiction (and some of its examples), I already had a very similar take on my ideal nano story. I completely agree with the definition quoted above as a basis for good short stuff (and I work from a very similar angle in choosing stories for Nanoism). But for some reason, in my experience (and especially in reading submissions for his original contest), many hint/nano stories are a not standalone stories at all but rather some kind of movie tag-line/newspaper headline that alludes to a story. They’re much more compelling if you imagine the guy from the movie previews reading them (though, really, wouldn’t that be true for everything?). If you read one of the various “six word story” outlets, you’ll see an even more extreme version of what I mean.  Entertaining—yes. Standalone—yes. Story? Debatable.

I’m not the kind of person who says a story can’t be short, obviously. But in my reading, it should have some self contained action. The beginning, middle, end definition is not particularly useful. Nor is the conflict, climax, resolution triad. In nanofiction, these elements are often implied in a word or phrase (hinted at, so to speak).  Given the length, it’s unavoidable. For “story”-judgment, I tend to ascribe to the idea of “change.” There must be some fundamental change for the character, however slight, from onset to ending. And to really hit home, the greater story must be hinted at. Leaving it out for the reader to make up is not hinting—it’s omission, and they are not the same thing.

One person killing another person with nothing else is not a story (but it is by far the most common theme I see). The author needs to give the reader some help in deciphering a greater narrative arc. There is a level of necessary vagueness to the form, but just tossing a scene out in 25 words does not a story make. All scene and no story is not good. All plot and no scene is also not good—it’s not supposed to be a synopsis, after all. You need both.

Submissions to the Hint Fiction anthology are open until the end of the month. While Mr Swartwood has already received over a 1000 entries and will publish probably no more than 150, perhaps your submission could net you $25 delicious dollars and an excuse to say, “Oh, why yes, I was published by Norton.”

Thaumatrope, twitterpunk—literature for procrastinating during your procrastination

08.05.09 // Writing

Thaumatrope: the first (and first paying) twitterzine (@thaumatrope), a twitter-based publication for microfiction. It is an idea that may almost seem frivolous to the uninitiated—stories in 140 characters? Why bother? What can you really say in around 20 words? Literary merits aside—with Twitter as a backdrop, would anyone argue that an intriguing or witty tweet-story is less engaging than someone’s personal struggle with productivity or the details of their latest bowel movement? Just kidding, I think Twitter is pretty neat. Anyway…

Thaumatrope also remains the most innovative of the twiction-pushers, including a unique program (the Thaumatrope Fiction Relocation Project) to include its fiction on the programs of conventions worldwide (really cool) and a special theme month with multi-award-winning guest editor Sean Wallace: Twitterpunk, a series of stories in celebration of cyberpunk and its related subgenres (steampunk, biopunk, et al.).  I was honored to have my story (probably coincidentally) kick off #twtrpunk this past weekend (click the link in Sean’s intro tweet to read the actual story).

While “-punk” themed stories of this length may be an homage that only fans of the genre will appreciate, nanofiction in general has a much broader appeal, at least for those of us with a few seconds to spare in between not doing work by reading the news and not doing work by playing addictive flash games. If nothing else, perhaps someone should go edit the “cyberpunk derivatives” article on Wikipedia and add “twitterpunk” to the list.

The Woman on the Sidewalk

08.01.09 // Writing

I have an edgy, mildly graphic piece in the new issue of SUB-LIT (“publishing the best in literary dissidence”), a site that specializes in awesome pieces that should (and do) have the tagline, Sex, Literature, and Rock & Roll.

I actually wrote “The Woman on the Sidewalk” over two years ago only to let it burn an erotic hole in my hard drive until I ran across SUB-LIT, at which point I metaphorically dusted it off and sent it out. I owe a big thank you to head editor Laurah Raines for working with me on this to make it even more awesome. Go read what my workshop professor might have called “an excellent, energetic tale about the effects of our hypersexualized society.”

Scientific Blindspots

07.26.09 // Miscellany

One of the internet’s double edged swords: a lot of information is good, but the consequent ton of poorly researched and incorrect information is bad. Even lay people who want to be up-to-date on science must swim through the well-intentioned mistakes of their sources. Take, for example, this article: “Blindspot shows brain rewiring in an instant.”

The title and thrust of the article is that because we don’t notice our blind spot (the spot where there are no photoreceptors due to the  optic nerve) even when deprived of input from the other eye, we must re-wire our brains instantaneously to compensate. “Re-wire” is in fact a horrible way to explain this phenomenon.

In order to produce our visual experience when deprived of input from both eyes, our brains utilize pathways that already exist—a sort of backup circuit. “Re-wire” implies that there the utilized pathway is new.

When the conductor of a train sees a problem ahead on the track and switches over at the next junction, he’s not building a new path. The other path has always been there, he’s just utilizing it in a situation when he otherwise might not.

Scientists have known for some time that the brain has alternate circuits for a variety of sensory modalities (think of “blindsight” for example). The fact that our brains can utilize our natural development and genetic predispositions to create this intricate machinery is incredible. The fact that our brains can cope with unexpected stimuli almost instantaneously is also amazing.  But, let’s be clear: re-wiring—also known as learning—takes time. Contrary to the article’s implication, this study says nothing to the contrary.

The Gates of Leaven

07.22.09 // Writing

Novels take time to write. What better way to catalog the essence of a story than by writing only the first and the last sentence? First and Last Sentence Magazine publishes just that: novels that don’t really exist by fictional authors offering up stories like mystery-meat sandwiches. Interesting premise. My offering, “The Gates of Leaven,” appeared today.

Too Quiet on the Carpet

07.08.09 // Writing

I’m really excited to see “Too Quiet on the Carpet” published as this week’s story at Brain Harvest: An Almanac of Bad Ass Speculative Fiction. Brain Harvest has been publishing one 750-word or shorter story each week since March, and each has been—in my reading—fully deserving of its “bad ass” designation.

As for my little story, it’s very odd but—I’m told—”really awesome” and “viciously sublime.” It’s a bit of a modern re-imagining of the basic premise from the story “Father’s Last Escape,” an amazingly weird magical realism tale by the early 20th-century Polish-Jewish writer Bruno Schulz.

Harriet

06.30.09 // Writing

I have a letter (yes, an actual letter) published in this issue of The Dirty Napkin, which is an awesome publication with intimidating contributor bios. The wonderful editors have also decided to make my audio reading one of the handful available to non-subscribers—so anyone can listen to me read it (beware).

The epistle is an interesting form. The email missive, the AIM conversation, the cacophony of “tweets”—these successors do not quite make for a true spiritual supplantation. And, though the epistle has a practical purpose (to convey a message),  its literary merit (if it exists) can be unrelated altogether. It may even be a pleasant surprise.

Bed Bath and Beyond Silly

06.27.09 // Miscellany

A bizarre conundrum:

If you make a return to Bed Bath & Beyond with a gift receipt, you get a gift card for store credit.

If you make the same return without a receipt, you get a store credit receipt: a regular-looking paper receipt with some old-fashioned highlighting and a signature or two or three.

Now, the receipt can be used in any store for any item. In other words, just like a gift card. What possible reason is there for using an easy-to-lose wrinkle-prone receipt for returns instead of a gift card (like every other store in the 21st century)? And if I have a gift card, why can’t I just add the return value onto it so I don’t have to carry around two pieces of paper and one piece of plastic in order to buy overpriced curtain rods?

If it has the exact same buying power, why make a distinction in the first place?

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